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The DesertLight Journal
Volume 1, Number 19
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December 26, 2001
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The bi-weekly e-zine of the International Men's Rights Movement. This is the first e-zine intended to focus primarily on the issues of domestic violence against men and divorce/child custody issues. We welcome news of groups, websites, and people in the men's rights movement worldwide. We encourage new writers and commentary.
For all the news all the time, visit our buds
http://www.mensactivism.org in the US
http://www.angryharry.com in the UK
or Men's News Daily http://www.divorceport.com anywhere.
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"A woman needs a man like a fish needs the river."
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IN THIS ISSUE
·
Raymond Cuttill (cyberManbooks.com)
·Lionel Richards (Ozydads)
·Mensactivism News Network
·Bud Johnson (AFTER<2001)
·Eugene Sullivan
·Tom Chandel
·NEW! Guest Editorial (at the website)
2001 was supposed to be a year of incredible growth, according to all the seers, astrologers and those who predict. They were right. At the end of 2000, the DesertLight Journal didn't exist. I was resisting the pull of activism, and really wanted to spend my time writing books and occasionally e-mailing my buds. Well, that didn't happen. After hearing about AZ father Chuck DiGeronimo, and his 85 days in jail on a bogus charge of Child Abuse, I joined a few e-mail discussion groups mainly to get a sense of what this 'men's movement' stuff was all about.
I met several guys on the now-defunct Themestream website, in late January. Those days were a lot of fun, as we 'broke the pink barrier,' and posted works on men's issues that had never appeared there before. Then we proceeded to congratulate each other on the excellence of our work, and we started telling all of our friends about these new writers we'd encountered. I started promoting these guys' work on a fairly regular basis, and added in a few chatty little news bits. I think I called it, "News from the Desert," or something, and really only sent it to a handful of friends and a couple of the lists I belonged to. I found myself collecting all kinds of news bits, and by April, decided I should really assemble these all in one place to save myself some time and effort. That was the first DesertLight Journal, which appeared April 25th. Of course, if you're doing anything online you really need to have a website, so on May 18th I launched the website, and officially became an e-zine publisher.
I wanted to keep the tone of the DLJ positive and hopeful, because so often I heard from men who were at the brink of disaster and couldn't see anything good in their futures at all. Somebody had to interject a kind word, applaud a success. I saw this as a moral imperative, because I honestly believedand still dothat change will come, and the current state of affairs, this misandric social climate, will evolve into something more equal for everyone. Women are already beginning to understand they've been lied to for 30 years, and what is commonly known as feminism was never about equality at all. Some of the issues that a year ago were considered strictly 'men's rights issues,' such as divorce/child custody and family court problems are beginning to be seen for what they really arehuman rights issues.
When I first began my research into domestic violence against men in 1999, the websites and orgs I found then were few and far between. I mentioned on an online writer's group the subject of the book I was writing, and I got comments like, "Men can't get abused, that's impossible," or "I didn't think men had any issues! LOL!"
They're not laughing anymore. There are now so many new websites and groups, on and offline, I can't keep up with them all. There are some tentative associations. The weekly chat between Mensactivism News Network and iFeminists may well change some minds and open some hearts. The merging of several online groups, some devoted to Child Protective Services issues, which are made up of mostly women, and some devoted to divorce/custody, which are mostly men, has resulted in a purely activist group called AFTER, American Families to Effect Reform. Families. Not men. Not women. Families. People want to raise their kids in peace and get the government out of their living rooms.
Men are sick of being portrayed as mindless buffoons or worse in the media. That's the purpose of the Stop Anti-Male Bias Yahoo Club, which in October was instrumental in creating and implementing the first pro-male awareness campaign for balanced US media coverage of domestic violence. With the recent addition/cooperation of AMEN, the Irish shelter for male victims of DV, next year it will be an international campaign.
Finally, the DLJ itself has its own changes to report. In partnership with Raymond Cuttill, of the Men's Hour online radio program, we have formed a new publishing house, cyberManbooks.com, to officially launch early next year. What makes cyberMan different from any other online publisher is that unlike any other publisher, print or electronic, authors won't be left to sink or swim on their own after the book comes out. We'll take them by the hand and show them what to do next.
It will be a busy year. So what else is new? Every year is busy. 2002 will be different. It will be far more productive than any year so far, because in 2001 we all were reminded of something: YOU CAN'T KEEP A GOOD MAN DOWN!
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RAYMOND CUTTILLCYBERMANBOOKS.COM
In 2001 I saw more of a men's movement, than I have before. I've been to
more protests than ever before. Previously, I'd heard little or nothing of
any protests. Unfortunately, it was also the year I saw a split in a men's
group. I still don't understand what happened and why. At its worst, the
men's movement is like a scene from Monty Python's Life of Brian. I am
thinking of when the People's Front of Judea and Judean People's Front met
in the Roman governor's mansion when they are both trying to kidnap the
governor's wife. In spite of being in the hated Roman enemy's stronghold,
they proceed to club each other senseless, much to the bemusement of two
Roman guards. For Romans, read feminists. Men's groups have to realise that
we can have different opinions, but we are still on the same side.
Nevertheless it was the year I saw protest action go from nearly nothing to
a frequent occurrence. I look forward to more of that. It rallies men (and
some women) and provides at least a small voice against the feminist
clamour.
I, myself, started the Men's Hour, and next year, am going to start (with
Trudy W. Schuett) cyberManbooks.com (Men friendly publishers) and my
MensMovement.org (Online Men's Resources/Lists/Studies). I look forward to
a year of progress in the Men's Movement. Men still don't see feminism as
an international problem and as a men's problem. They still see it as an
individual problem about a particular policy with a particular feminist or
particular court; but more men are starting to challenge feminist doctrine,
at least in private. Maybe in 2002 they'll challenge it more in public.
The more men hear that some men won't take this **** any more, the more men
will realise that they don't have to take this **** any more.
Raymond Cuttill
http://www.cyberManbooks.com, http://www.menshour.com,
http://www.mensmovement.org
Men's Books, Men's Radio, Men's Resources and Men's Studies
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LIONEL RICHARDS--OZYDADS
When I was first drawn into the Family Law arena, I expected to find some
form of intelligence and equity but I was very wrong. Despite using the
'best interests of the children' as their excuse, they showed no concern at
all for my children's well-being. For a while I accepted this as my fate but
in a few short years my children were running away from their mother with
stories that forced me to take the matter back to the Family Court. But
nothing had changed and the court believed their mother when she said "the
children are lying, their father told them what to say to fool the court
counsellor so they could live with him" ?? Eventually I won the full
residence of my 11yo son but his younger brother and sister are still
prisoners in their abusive stepfather's castle. I'm about to go back to the
Family Court with an application for 50/50 Equal Parenting and I'm quietly
confident of achieving this for my children. Wish me luck.
A disenfranchised father put his neck on the line behind my shop as an
unwelcome surprise for the train driver who was helpless to avoid
decapitating him, and quite recently our (former) garbage truck driver
hanged himself out of desperation of his helpless family law position.
I formed the OzyDads Network www.OzyDads.net and then
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/OzyDads as an e-group to share information and
compare strategies with others in the same boat.
Recently I started another e-group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/stopPAS and
a web site to address Parental Alienation www.FamilyMending.net PAS is
emotional child abuse and anyone who thinks differently about that is either
twisted or blind to the truth (or both)
People (mainly fathers) found their way to me and I have been helping them
to win residence or reasonable visitation with their children against all
odds.
I have been quite prolific in my letters to the politicians at home and
abroad, I've even written to the President of America voicing my concerns
on the gender bias in Family Law.
I take great umbrage at the fact that "Father Knows Best" has been changed
to "Fathers Molest" when history proves that abusive and violent behaviour
knows no gender boundaries.
The Family Court is an ASS and its Lawyers are ASSHOLES and that's probably
why the Fathers who pass through it are considered to be nothing but little
pieces of worthless SHITE.
I could go on and on and on but I've said it all before on my web site and
I'm sure there are more than enough contributors out there with stories more
worthy than mine.
Best wishes with your journal,
Kind regards,
Lionel Richards help@ozydads.net
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THE MEN'S ACTIVISM NEWS NETWORK:
2001 has definitely been an exciting and promising year for the men's
movement. From young Clayton Giles' hunger strike and bike trip across
Canada and to Washington, D.C, to the publication of "Spreading
Misandry: The Teaching of Contempt for Men in Popular Culture," to the
outcry over the Boulder Public Library's male bashing art exhibit "Hung
out to dry" and more, there has been a lot of activity and increasing
media coverage of men's issues.
The Mensactivism.org community has also grown by leaps and bounds,
particularly with the announcement that the Individualist Feminist
movement, headed by Wendy McElroy, and Mensactivism.org are going to
work on more joint projects in the future. The fact that more and more
women are joining our movement (including the efforts of Trudy Schuett
herself!) are signs that we have a lot to look forward to in 2002. And
while we still need to promote men's groups and help awaken more men to
the sexism that is silently destroying their lives, no one can deny that
it is only when men and women work together with trust and respect for
each other that justice for everyone will be achieved.
There are so many people we'd like to thank for their efforts and
support that to do so would fill up many pages. So, to keep it short,
we'd like to thank every single person who has visited Mensactivism.org
this year and wish you all Happy Holidays!
Let's make 2002 at least as good as 2001 for men's rights!
Sincerely,
Scott Garman, scott@mensactivism.org
James Hanback, nightmist@mensactivism.org
Adam Hartney, adam@mensactivism.org
The Mensactivism.org Admin Team
http://www.mensactivism.org
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BUD JOHNSON-- AFTER<2001
Merry Christmas doesn't mean much for so many because their loved ones are far away from them. I know this feeling all to well. So this year I want to offer each my feeling as a gift of understanding.
For all The fathers that miss their children: I too will be without my children this Christmas but our children are with us in our thoughts and in our hearts. No amount of distance can tear them from you because they are with you and always will be. Love knows no distance and no boundary. You have them in your every thought and prayer and hope.
For the mothers that miss their children: It has been said mothers have a special bond of love for their children and as the father your children are with you. You can remember each little thing they did and the love you felt at their first step or first word. They sweet ladies are with you in your heart. Cherish the dreams and hopes for them and they will be with you forever.
For the children who feel abandoned: You are the special ones-- God's gift to your parents. You feel like they don't want you or even care but nothing could be further from the truth. They love you with heart and soul and every fiber of their being. Keep them in your heart knowing they love you more than life itself. They are with you no matter where you are your parents are with you and always will be.
For Everyone who feels alone: Nothing could be further from the truth for you also. Someone does love you and cares about you. It may be a friend or a person you have never met. But the world is filled with deeply caring people that truly love everyone> So you are not alone share your love with someone and fill your heart with knowing they love you and are with you.
For the Grandparents: You have learned to share your love and your heart even though it may feel full has plenty of room left to love someone and them loving you. The world loves you because of your love for your family.
For everyone my gift for each of you: Peace, Love, Joy, Hope, and most of all my thanks because you are special and you are loved. May the very BEST life has to offer be yours now and always.
Bud
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Many groups have considered forming a coalition of groups to become an activist organization that will work for changing the system and the injustices families around the world face daily. In the middle of 2001 several started talking about doing it, and by November a new coalition of more than 10 groups was started. AFTER<2001 was the new coalition's name. American Families To Effect Reform and the symbol < meaning greater than and the year the coalition was formed. We start into 2002 reaching out to people around the world with a branch in New Zealand to launch this worldwide effort into the coming year. As the New Year gets under way the coalition will be stepping into the real world as well as our ongoing online efforts. Any activist or group/organization that is willing to work for change are invited to join this growing coalition and make a difference!
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AFTER2001/
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EUGENE SULLIVAN
In Ireland, 2001 was the year of the Parents Defence Campaign - the year the
judges who are kidnapping our children began to get seriously worried.
Burning the visitation papers showed everybody what family law is really all
about - taking children away from parents. It's a filthy disgusting
business operated by filthy disgusting people who are terrified to be shown
up for what they really are.
"WHAT ARE ACCESS ORDERS?" said the man with the megaphone.
"JUDGES LIES!" the crowd roared.
It was Fathers' Day in Dublin. The dads and their supporters met outside
Dolphin House, the Dublin District Court - or "THE CHILDSNATCHERY" as dads
prefer to call it. The Irish Times put the numbers at "more than 60"; the
Mirror said "about 200". But whatever the numbers, the dads were all angry.
"Why are they taking away our homes? Why are they taking our children?" the
speaker asked.
"Because lawyers find it a highly profitable business- and because we do not have a judiciary independent of the lawyers."
It brought the biggest cheer of the day.
"But that's not enough for them. It's not enough to take away our children; they even obstruct our right to visit them! Look at these pieces of paper, these so-called 'visitation rights'. They are no more than judicial lies. Their one purpose is to hide the cruelty of taking children away from parents. They are not enforced; they are NEVER enforced! We see our children by permission or not at all. WHAT ARE THEY FIT FOR?"
"THE FIRE!" roared the crowd.
Peter Coleman, Chairman of the PARENTS' DEFENCE CAMPAIGN, the umbrella body
which organized the demonstration, then collected all the court orders for visitation "rights" and put them in an iron tray. They were then sprinkled with white spirit and publicly burned. The dads then marched to ST. Stephen's Green where a band played music. It was a sad day, but a very proud one!
<eugene@chalwar.com>
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TOM CHANDEL
In 1997, when I first became aware of these issues, I thought I was very
much alone in my concerns, that perhaps there was something wrong with
*me*. I had the good fortune then to meet Larry Ouellette who was
running Maine Dads. Larry opened my mind to the broad range of Family
Law issues, and although I admit that I had much initial skepticism
related to his observations and conclusions, I later found his
descriptions and predictions to be right on target, and even prophetic.
The family rights agenda is so broad as to seem to be overwhelming
sometimes. Those issues have included father's rights, which we are
familiar with, and is the topic most often identified with us, but also
grandparents' rights, foster care and foster placement issues, access
and visitation, non-custodial parental rights, lack of recognition of
domestic violence against men, child support, court bias and lack of
independence.
When I review these issues, I can see tangible progress being made. Some
areas we have had a direct involvement in, others a peripheral
involvement, and some possibly none at all, but we recognize and
appreciate that our extensive agenda is getting attention it deserves.
Significant advances I have seen the last 4 years in Maine include:
1. The formation of the Battered Men's Helpline. Formed last year, run
and supported entirely by volunteers, this serves as a lifeline for
hundreds of men who have used the helpline in the year since it was
formed. The Battered Men's Helpline, which may be one of the only
Helplines for men in the country, demonstrates that a few committed
individuals *can* make a difference. For those who doubt our commitment,
ability to get things done or the huge need to address our issues, the
Battered Men's Helpline serves as a flagship to dispel those who suggest
that men don't need services.
I want to express deep-felt appreciation to Jan and Tedd Brown for their
efforts to form and maintain this service. Greater love hath no man...
(or woman!)... :-)
2. The passing of the presumption of joint custody bill in Maine this
year. This is a great bill and shows that the Maine legislature
recognizes the importance that both parents stay involved in the lives
of their children. Someday the courts and DHS may also accept that
premise, but those folks aren't as bright as most, so it might take some
time. :-)
3. Grandparents' rights legislation passed in Maine that was upheld by
the Maine Supreme Court in a majority decision that was authored by our
new Chief Justice. That decision, Rideout v. Riendeau, forced the State
of Maine light years forward in recognizing that the need of children
are supreme to the needs of any other individual.
4. Attention to foster care and parental rights termination issues. The
terrible tragedy this year of the death of a child in State foster care
has highlighted foster care issues including court and DHS problems that
have been well known by family rights activists for years. This was a
horrible, ugly case which stripped away much of the veneer the state has
used to cover up its mismanagement of the foster care system, while
exposing serious problems the courts have addressing these issues.
Underneath that veneer, we have seen stripped bare a bureaucracy that is
worse than our worst fears might lead us to believe. We can only hope
now that those who have the power to do so work to fix this problem.
Let no one say that progress is not being made on these issues. We've
come a long way, and still have a long way to go.
Best,
Tom Chandel <tomchand@NXI.COM
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NEW GUEST EDITORIAL
Entitled "The Changing Role of Fatherhood" at:
http://desertlightjournal.homestead.com/guest.html
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We leave you with the 'Zonie blessing--"May you always have a full tank of
gas and underwear that doesn't ride up!"
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Trudy W. Schuett
Publisher
http://www.desertlightjournal.homestead.com/
PO Box 1252 Yuma AZ 85366
©2001 TWSchuett
All rights reserved
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Commentary and contributed articles are not necessarily the opinion of the DesertLight
Journal. We strive to include all views in the emerging men's rights movement, and
therefore cannot be expected to agree with everything.
