Forrest

The DesertLight Journal

It was just a week left in our time before my son, James had to go to his Court-ordered visit back to Alaska, and live with his mother and his new " step-father,"( how he put it) for the summer.

So, I asked him, seeing his recent success in playing Bass (both Guitar and stand up), in Concert Band and Chorus, Jazz Band and Musicals for-he was the only Bass player that could read music in the entire High School. If HE would like me to set up a time for him to play in Milwaukee, with some Blues men I knew. "That would be neat!" was his response.

So, I called up to my friends and was told: Sure!! He can play at the Open MIC night, come up on Sundays!' We start at nine; he can come up then, Come ON!! It will be good to see ya!"

After finding out the laws on him being in a bar, ( okay as long as I was present as his parent) we packed up the sandwiches, and pop and coffee thermos, some tapes and Dad's book of poems, we checked the car- oil okay- tires okay- get some gas on the way-better get it in Indiana because Chicago and Wisconsin on some weirdo Eco trip and it costs big bucks up there, over $2.00 a gallon-off we went leaving Indianapolis at 4:00 P.M.

After the Race, (Indy 500), I gathered up James to go, he would have to help out with the driving, but first we needed to stop at the music store and get some new strings. Again his Alaskan eyes were glossed over in delight, here was a normal music store...well stocked and full of goodies...guitars everywhere and over 20 types of strings to pick from, plus they had ALL of the new goodies, amps, remotes, WA- WA pedals, all of the things that makeup a music store, but to him it was ALL newand he wanted to see and play with it alldragging him out, we started up I-65.

The trip up was good one, he was a good driver and he relived me at the wheel, but gave it up at the entrance to the Skyway, and let me drive through Chicago, and up to Milwaukee.

His Alaskan eyes were wide open as we drove through the Windy City, he loved that Sears Tower, and commented on how smart is was for the people in Chicago to have trains running up the middle of the Interstate, he had never seen that before.

The skies had cleared for the moment, in downtown Milwaukee, as the setting Sun, forced a blue sky hole and we found the Blues bar and called my friends apartment, and drove over with his good directions to the place.

'Open Mic! Big Willies Open Jam!' proclaimed the sign over the UP & UNDER BLUES BAR. James had bought five new strings for his electric bass, and he was stringing them as we drove in to town, and he was worried and excited about his performance, and with great guitar player like Big Willie Higgins. We found Willie to be living with Ellen nearby the club on trendy Brady street, "Come on!! MAN!! Come IN!' we were greeted by Willie.

Ellen is suffering from shingles, she did not get up to greet us, and was resting on the couch, and later she confessed CANCER.

James & I went over to the club, he intently looking at the guitars autographed and placed over the bar, and the signed photos of the 'Blues Greats' that had played there, and we watched and listened to Big Willie and his group open up the nights shows and his urgings to " sign up!! The sign-up sheets up here!and he finished the first set with the normal ( for Willie) jaw dropping set with a smoking version of a Jimi Hendrix blues tune played flawlessly with the guitar behind his back.

Beginning of the 2nd set I opened with: The Things We Carried-Poem, it was Memorial Day weekend. I embellished it, Vietcong weed in Kool, Newport and Marlboro packs. We carried the WORLD, and wearing red arm bands. And, we didn't want to get shot...

I could NOT hear my own voice from the stage at all, and the band was puzzled as I told them just play what ya feel- they got into it after hearing the first verses, and set up some real weird sounds as though we were in a war zone.. The poem was received well, and people cheered, and many older Veterans came up after and shook my hand Most seriously.

People got very drunk then and the night continued on. Thomas Humphrey came down to see James, and was surprised by his height and his playing bass. James was self conscious but hit the notes cleanly. But seemed to be concentrating so hard he was pressed not to make any mistakes and didn't know of various terms, 'in 5'.etc. but he did well...the drummer stank, and could not keep a beat so the rest of the band leaned on James bass playing to keep going in time.

We went out because of the heat and the smoke, to cool off. James and the guitar player had a good talk. . And he confessed HIS father had supported him in his learning to play, and his career choices. Then the set livened up, and Willie and "Hump" played togethergood stuff. They knew where each other were going and had played together for many years off & on, and they really had some fun! As Willie took another solo then another, and yet another, I watched closely the various guitar players in the room, as they watched in rapt attention at Willie's licks on his axe.

At closing time, the waitresses and bartenders had a hard time clearing out the place -- many were drunk.

"It's closing time!! It's closing time!! Let us go home!"

Finally we got all of the equipment in to the various vans and trucks, and I was tired and looking to drive back to Indianapolis, the lights were out, and the doors closed.

Standing in the weak Midwest constant rain, I was told; there was to be an 'After Party' and held at Willies & Ellen's place.

It was Also!! Ellen's Birthday party.

And I was asked to do a favor by Ellen: Please take 2 women over to their place, to get a bottle of Wine and return to her place to stay for the night.

"Did you bring sleeping bags..?''

Nope, we can't stay.

"You must!' she insisted.

No.

She further demanded we stay and sleep on the floor.

I declined firmly.

She was in tears now;"I'm dying of Cancer, I'll never see you again!!'

Still I restated: We are leaving tonight.

She was very upset at this, I tried to explain:

"You KNOW me, Ellen; I have to keep on the move."

She still insisted we stay, but I demurred, and it became an issue of control, or CUNTROL, (one she would not give up on either.)

She then asked me again, to take 2 young women to their apartment to get a bottle of wine to return to the party.

"Here, take my car, (handing over the keys to her house,) The keys to the car (a Mercedes SUV) are on the table by the couch. Will you go and do this as a favor for me, Please?"

"Okay." And off we went...

Outside I asked, "how far is the place?"

And was told: "3 blocks. I said: "Well, we can walk It... we got a block or so up the street and the one womyn she balked and began a huge scene.

Hollering: "I won't!! I won't!! I need to be taken there go get your car!" she commanded.

Even after urging by her friend and me: "Come on, its only 2 more blocks." She refused to move, and demanded I go back and get my car and get her, "Right HERE! I'll be right here!"

So, (remember this is a favor for Ellen), I did so,

And was directed loudly and this womyn (of 20 something) demanded we park just so, and:"Wait right HERE!"

While we waited, I started a decent conversation with the other women, she had children at home.and wanted to leave right then.

And she asked if I was a musician?

'No, a writer- I gave the poem at the beginning of the 2nd set....' She remembered it and asked me to read some of my work. So, I grabbed my folder and picked out the poem: Poem for the Disembodied. "This WAS to be- the 2nd poem I read tonight, you will like it. I ripped into It.and she was enjoying it-

And the other womyn returned and began speaking rudely right over it..;

"Okay! NOW take us to the party!!" rude, bossy and LOUD. The other women picked up on her insanityand then bowed out of going to the party,"Is this going to be one of those 3-4 hours of drunken, stoned party?"

"YEAH it IS!" , announced her Macha friend.

Well, in that case I'd better go home, now." So I drove her to her car, parked ½ ways up the block.and was told loudly "That car! what are YOU stupid?!!, and other drunken insults.

After the seeming neat women got out of the car I was ordered to: "Drive on!! Leave HER!"

I waited until her car started, and after she got it going, I pulled away -- getting more and more pissed by the second.

Then this drunken womyn she ordered me around the 2 block return to the party and when told of my name made it seem shitty: "What kind of name is Forrest?" So, you're a writer?? Well, U must hear some of MY poems!" Park HERE!! Where are you going??" YOU can't U turn here!!' and I did so as I wanted to keep the car and its trunk in sight (James had his bass in there).I was told where to park, and I was told: 'YOU can't drive at all!' She got out of the car and proceeded to the door.

We went up to the small wooden frame building, where she pounded on the door so hard, it caused some fear inside, and James told Willie: "It's my Dad-- It's okay."

Willie came to the door and let us in.

The party was in various rooms, coke in the back room, weed traveling around and the wine bottle sat up unused on the tablethe womyn who had ordered me around and hollered at me in the street now commanded me to sit on the couch with her. I ignored her-and went to see James in the front room. He was in a conversation with another musician and seemingly having a good time, but remarked, "This is weird, Dad."

I went back to the kitchen, and searched for something to drink. Where is the coffee? Again, the back bedroom has its own party going on behind closed doors Willie came out and found me rummaging through the cupboards, mumbling "Coffee..."

Ellen came out and insisted again I stay the night, and fell stoned into my arms with the "I'm dying ...how you can leave us?" pleading "Oh, Jack...Jack..." She was hysterical.

I reasserted: "I'm Jack, I come & go when I want to, come on! I'm Jack!"

She took it in, but was still upset.and left the room.

I went again to check on James and he was doing... okay-still talking to the musicians who were playing on the front rooms piano, and having their discrete respectful party, oblivious to the goings on in the next rooms(s). They stopped the music to talk to Willie, "Hay man? What's with these womyn?? Willie referred them to me; "Tell 'em Jack!"They are soooo-ents!! CUNTS, they are acting as though their cunts are gold or something weird."

I returned to the kitchen to find Willie coming out of the rear bedroom (Coke area), and he had made coffee for me (Again, he was surrounded with non-functioning womyn)

Sort of a Milwaukee Norm. Here were young and old white womyn, demanding, bossing around black and poor musicians, and loud, rude and scatter- brained. Acting cuntemptble.

Willie only had a few moments to chat, and he expressed many frustrations in his life..." "You would not believe it! Jack, life has been very strange lately.."

I gave his own words back to him from 1999: "if it's not one thing, it's three or four others!' Eh?" "Yeah", he agreed. I again said I gotta leave.and he understood.

I stood in the kitchen and wondered why I was at this party, and how to disengage from it. While the coffee brewed I went back into the living room, pointedly ignoring the womyn with the wine bottle, and her conversation(s), and I was NOT alone, as others were ignoring her as well. She had this loud and arrogant way of speaking.( masking insecurities?-whatever) , and tended to run over what ever anybody else was saying, wrapped in self importance, and living for the moment. I returned to the kitchen and waited on the coffee. Willie reappeared and made a cup for Ellen, who again demanded with Willie looking on, that I stay and sleep on the floor for the night. Then a different woman came into the kitchen and thanked me for the poem, I had read, as: NO one was paying attention that it WAS Memorial Day, and how her brother had died in Vietnam, and how that loss -- she really never got over.

I took my coffee out to speak further to her, and thank her for her nice words. then downed the coffee, still planning my escape.

I got my things together, and informed James one more cup of coffee and we are gone. He nodded across the room.

I went back into the kitchen got another cup and here comes Ellen full blast." You must stay! (Weeping)...I'll never see you again!!' and it was as though we never had the previous conversation(S). Gulping down the 2nd cup, I made my way out.

Now, the wine womyn was shouting at me, "Hey Forrest, FORREST!"

I moved through the living room, got James, told Willie:"I'm gone-my man," He nodded; "This it?" We moved out to the porch, for Good-byes while Willie was telling me of his next gig at the coming SUMMERFEST concertout comes the wine womyn:" Jack! (Rudely, she started in on me, interrupting my good conversations with Willie, my good friend I hardly see anymore-she had my name now.)

"Where do YOU think YOU are going??!"

I'm leaving

She then ordered me: "Well, you call me tomorrow and we will go to lunch and I will read you MY poems, then we can talk about getting me published -- who is your agent?"

This was the final straw, the public hollering at me in the street, the nasty interruptions, the talking over my conversations with my friend Willie, which was the final straw.

I blew up!

"I have NO interest in seeing you ever-NONE!"

The fact that I raised my voice near her vagina, and was refusing her demands was unknown, new experience for her.

The words seemed to slam into her with a force of a punch; she backed up onto the front door" I didn't know." words fumbled out.

Willie was shocked by my blast, as we are usually kind to each other as we both have enough people fking with us both, and speak in gentle words to most everybody.

"I'll try to catch ya at SUMMERFEST!" I told Willie, he nodded, and we split!

Later James was puzzled at the adults who offered him all sorts of things at the party (while I was doing Ellen a 'favor")

"What things can you have?? I mean, there's 'blow', and wine and beer, and marijuana."

Much to my delight he had refused them all, and was puzzled on how quickly he was dismissed by most of the womyn talking loud and full of cocaine, these people were rude beyond anything he had ever experienced.

It was then while we headed back south that we had a long talk about drugs, the overuse and abuse of them here in America, and the thought of these womyn that were so demanding and rude and seemingly had no future.

"The racist way they treated the black guys, Dad? What's UP with that? Why do they treat men like that? I have never seen ANYTHING like that."

They think it is normal to act that way, it IS normal in feminist Macha, man-hating Milwaukee, Chicago, Minneapolis, to them this IS the normal way to act, rude, nasty to men, they know nothing else. They live under the New World Odor and its Ukase.

"They were destroying their lives!! WHY?? It was stupid, Dad!"

I could not argue with him.

They are living for the moment for no reason.

Jack Forrest Milwaukee 05/28/01 Bambu Publishing

Jack Forrest